At $100 an hour he can’t possibly afford it on his teacher’s salary … but there’s a twist that weakens his argument about her “being financially manipulative.”
A woman has taken to the internet for advice after an argument with her husband over — you guessed it — household chores and finances.
However, the entire tale, which was posted to an anonymous forum, had enough twists and turns to elevate it to viral status on Reddit.
From who really was the breadwinner in the household to questions of sweat equity vs financial contributions, this bit of domestic drama delivered on all fronts.
Read on to see the whole tale — and how Redditors reacted.
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Original AITA (am I the a–hole) Reddit Post
The original poster (a.k.a. “OP”) kicked off the post by giving some background information.
“I am a Steamfitter. But I’ve been at it for a while and I’m in supervision. With bonuses and incentives but not counting benefits I earn over $100 an hour,” she wrote.
“I also work out of town. I started doing that once the kids were old enough to take care of themselves with their dad at home. So when my youngest was in middle school and the oldest was a junior in high school.”
OP went on to express gratitude for the situation they are in.
“It is great. Our retirement savings are piling up and we have been able to splurge on the kids. And ourselves.”
But, of course, there was a fly in the ointment.
This doesn’t automatically mean he’s an evil woman hater on a power trip that can’t stand his wife so watching her suffer and serve gets his peepee hard.
“My husband is upset however because I decided to pay for a cleaning lady,” she explained. “He and I discussed it and we agreed that him and the kids didn’t do a great job keeping the house clean and tidy while I was away. I hated coming home to a mess. It caused a few fights because it was like they expected me to come home and clean up after them.”
While her husband may have issues with having the extra help, OP said: “Having her is fantastic. I come home to a clean house and I am happier. My kids have more time to study and do extracurriculars. They still have chores and they are still expected to clean up after themselves.”
But as she stated above, her spouse was not on the same page.
“My husband came to me last time I was home and said we should cut back on the service when I’m home. That I should be doing more housework. He thinks that we are wasting money. I said that I work 14 days in a row and that those are 13 hour days. Yes it is mostly paperwork but his job as a teacher isn’t much more physically challenging. I said that I could offer him two options. If he wanted we could completely get rid of the service and him and the kids could make sure the house was in good shape when I got home. Or he could pay me my hourly rate to do extra housework when I am on my days off.”
“He is upset with me and says that I’m being financially manipulative,” OP wrote, concluding the post. “I think if he and the kids actually did what they are supposed to do when I’m away none of this would be an issue.”
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How The Reddit Community Reacted
Almost no one thought OP was in the wrong. In fact, as you might expect many commenters performed epic takedowns of her husband.
However, the highest-rated comment on the post had a much more balanced approach:
“So, you can afford it, everything gets done, everybody has free time, nobody has to do s–t they don’t want to do, there aren’t any fights over it – I mean, there’s really no downside and everybody wins. Him getting upset because you said if the maid goes he’ll have to do his fair share is very telling. You’re not home to make the messes, but you’re supposed to work THAT much, and come clean up after him just because he wants to ‘save money’ while getting to sit on HIS ass? People like your husband always reinforce my decision to stay single.”
While that seemed pretty rough on the husband, the commenter followed up with an “edit” to their post, writing: “Oh Lord, people are getting really carried away in the comments. Not surprised cause Reddit, but c’mon now. We don’t know the husband at all and only have to judge going by the contents of this post. It’s entirely possible the husband really does want to save money because he’s cheap, but he’s just a self absorbed, lazy, thoughtless dunce wanting to do so at OP’s expense. What’s that saying? ‘Never attribute malice that which can be explained by stupidity’ or something like that? Doesn’t make sense, but some people just lack the logic chip.”
All breasts were DD-sized but never saggy, women would drink beer and eat fries but never gain weight.
The Redditor went on to add: “Still TA but this doesn’t automatically mean he’s an evil woman hater on a power trip that can’t stand his wife so watching her suffer and serve gets his peepee hard. Some of you drama llamas need to get a grip, stop projecting your prejudices and bad experiences onto everybody else, and go touch some grass.”
However, it wasn’t all slings and arrows as many a commenter went down a rabbit hole of writing epic satiric takedowns of 1950s domestic fantasies.
“Once upon a time in Fantasyland every woman worked outside the home to bring in enough money to significantly contribute to the household but not more than their husbands, while also doing all household chores,” wrote one talented Redditor. “They did that while wearing modest clothes so no other men would look at them while also wearing sexy lingerie for their husbands to see on demand. They were always in the mood to get frisky but were also all virgins. All breasts were DD-sized but never saggy, women would drink beer and eat fries but never gain weight.”
Another took their lead and wrote one for men: “Yes, and all husbands earned enough to fully support a family of 5. Owned their own home, 2 cars & a holiday house with regular travel. They had impeccable hygiene & were respectful and reliable. They always asked for seconds of their beautifully prepared meals but never lost their 6 pack or chiseled jawline. Beautiful jewelry was bought for his wife for all their milestones. Fresh flowers overflowed their home from his regular romantic dates and dinners and often just because. Fantasyland really was a glorious place!”
Others on the thread were simply turned off by marriage in general, with one summing it up as follows: “Ugh I am never never never getting f–king married.”
What do you think?
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